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Get the Full StoryThe Eborsisk Dragon from Willow toy!

Yes, that one on the right is Laurel and that one on the left is Yanny. And just for the record, I hear, “MAKE IT FUCKING STOP ALREADY SHIT!”

1988’s Willow was always eons better than any Star Wars movie to me, because it had Warwick Davis as its star, it had the essence of nut-busting hotness in the form of Val Kilmer working a slick back mullet and skinny braids, and one of the monsters makes my b-hole both jump back in fear and also say all flirty-like, “Why, hello there…”

The Eborsisk Dragon was born during a battle when Willow used a wand to transform a troll into anything but a troll. But Willow ended up turning that troll into a two-headed fire breathing dragon that was almost, but not quite, as scary and destructive as the two-headed dragon named Pence and Trump.

The Eborsisk Dragon, who was apparently named after Siskel & Ebert, gets murdered quickly and its cameo is a short one. But it’s easily the unforgettable breakout star of the movie, because who can forget a creature that looks like a cross between “two diseased dicks wearing hats made out of tortoise shells” and “two diseased dicks with heads like the SpaceBalls alien baby“? The Eborsisk Dragon also made the same face any dick makes when it finds out its about to procreate with a Kardashian.

And here’s another angle the Eborsisk Dragon. If you didn’t think they looked like two dicks with turd tips before, this picture should make you say, “That’s a dick… and another dick!”

The Eborsisk Dragon toy is somewhat of a collector’s item. There’s one going for 300 on eBay. Yes, 300 is a lot, but then again, you do get 2 dildos for 1. It’s a steal!

Pic: My Side of the Laundry Room, Pinterest

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